I missed it!

Sunday Night Football! Last night I was watching the Eagles ver. Dollass game. It was the fourth quarter, and I was having trouble keeping my eyes opened, sorry to say. The game was exciting, but my dosage was wearing off.

There were less than three minutes left and the referees were reviewing a fumble that I missed, my eyes were closed for a second. I looked at the clock and thought the game was going into overtime. I needed something to keep my eyes opened for a fifth quarter.

It was past time to take the dog out, so I figured a brisk walk would help me stay awake. I usually take him for a quarter mile walk before turning in. We went out thinking just a short walk, but before I knew it the dog was pulling me around the block. We got home and the game was over.

“What, What Happened!”

I missed it???

After the review the Eagles kept the ball and, “the next play they scored and held on to win the game.”???

If you don’t know why the Eagles Fans hate Dallas so much, you must have missed the 80s. The Cowboys kept bucking the Eagles out of the post season in the 80s. The Eagles Fans are an extraordinary group of characters, a few weeks ago I saw a spoof film on the Fox pregame show. They included a seen from a half time show when the Eagles Fans booed and threw snow balls at Santa.

“What gives him the right to be so jolly, when the Eagles are losing.”

That’s my defense.

“Why I shot my dog”

I feel I should let you know that Chancy Boy is alive and well? I write mostly fiction?

http://espn.go.com/nfl/recap?gameId=400791734

Chance on Kitchen floor

I didn’t mean to do it???

Oh I hate him, I wish I could talk to him, I’m hopeless. What could I do to make him see me for who I am, do I want him to see a week little girl with a crush? He always passes me in class, to his seat at the back of the room. He’s not one of the bad kids, but he stays hidden, and tries not to be noticed in class.

He’s quiet, but not shy with his friends. I wish I was one of his friends. My mom used to say that I needed to be more out going to make friends. I don’t know how outgoing she was, other than with her Covent. I would ask her if I could go with her and her friends, but she always said, “Focus on your study’s dear, and after you find your focus you may join us.”

Every full moon she would party with the Covent, but I never could join them, because my mother never thought I had enough focus. I guessed that she meant I had to graduate school first, but now she’s gone, and she was my only friend. I go to the attic to look threw her boxes of books and Halloween stuff.

When she was alive it was like Halloween all year, but we didn’t have candy, she would make funny looking meals from time to time. Maybe one of the books is a cook book, and I could make something the boy would like.

Oh I haven’t been up here for a while. There’s dust everywhere, oh there are her boxes, let’s see.  Spells, spells, spells, oh what’s this? Love Spells, well maybe there’s something like directions on making a pie for someone you love.

What’s this, directions to make a doll, no that can’t be right? Love Doll, use to control your love. Maybe I can learn to control my love, so I stop loving what I can’t have…no this says it’s used to control the person who you love. Will this work? Well, what do I need?

The next day the girl had a small doll in her bag that she made from what she found in the attic and a few things she has collected over the years of the boy she loves to hate. She walked nervously for her locker, and had a thought that she might leave the doll in the locker.

She saw the boy was down the hall, with doll in hand she walked up behind him and said under her breath the incantation to spell the doll for the boy.

She took a step back, and said, “Hi John.”

John made a quick 180 to face her, and said, “Oh, Amy I was wondering who was sneaking up behind me.”

Amy stood with a grin.

He snarled at her and said, “Keep your distance.” And terns back to his friends.

Amy’s eyes widened, she looked at the doll, turned away, squeezed its head and heard a thud behind her.

The boy was on the ground with his hands grasping at his head. The girl dropped the doll and the boy cried out.

Why three SUVs?

We have a flower-garden with nice trees and flowers that my father has been neglecting over the past few years, but last week he started pulling weeds. He told me to dump the wheelbarrow in the back and collect all of his clippings and weeds he pulled. I’ve cleared the aria the past few mornings after walking the dog, “Chance” around the block in the morning.

On Saturday I thought I would help my father out and suggested that I could use a strong metal rake over the arias he cleared to clean it up. The next morning’s I’ve raked out all of the clippings and thin vines that were covering the ground. He had found some fall flowers that had grown some leaves in the next aria he cleared.

My father told me to watch out for them the next time I raked the garden. The next morning after walking Chance I went to the front and saw the nice leaves and started using the rake. After the first raking I looked around to avoid the new leaves, but I couldn’t find them and without another thought I raked the rest of the aria.

Later that day my father called for me and with his graying black Irish hair and blue eyes, said, “John you, there are just stems where the flowers were, I asked you to look out for.”

My first reply was, “Sorry, I saw the leaves?” Then I said, “But after my first swipe with the rake, they were gone.”

The next day I was taking Chance for his afternoon walk, but before I got to the end of the long driveway I saw my father pulling weeds, and he called me over. I thought he wanted help, so I let go of the leash and guessed Chance would stay close. He pointed out some plants that he didn’t want me to disturb tomorrow morning.

After he was finished pointing out each plant, Chance was nowhere to be seen. I said, “You made me lose Chance.”

He shook his head, and said, “I didn’t make you do anything. Why did you let go of the leash?”

“I thought you needed help.”

“I just wanted to show you the plants, so you don’t pull them out.”

Chance was in the neighbor’s yard eating freshly laid mulch. I pulled him away and took him for his afternoon walk.

The next morning my father had an early doctor’s appointment, and I heard him stirring as I let the house with Chance for his morning walk. After the walk I fed Chance, had a drink, and changed the long sleeve shirt for a sleeveless one. I started gathering the clippings and big weeds when my father slowly pulled down the driveway to where I was.

He lowered the car’s window, and said, “You know which the good plants are.”

“Yeah, I’ll be sure to pull them out.”

He grinned, because it’s usually him who uses that kind of humor and then drove off.

I was raking the aria and avoiding the plants my father wanted to keep, when three black SUVs with tinted windows pulled in our long driveway. I dropped the rake and thought, this can’t be good, and I picked up a fist size rock I found in the garden.

I’m not a big man standing at five foot six, but I am stronger than most would think. Even-though I am thirty eight years old, I look like a punk kid, because of my height and the Irish baby face I was cursed with.

The first SUV stopped when it reached me, and I raised the rock as the door opened, and said, “Stay in the car. What business do you have with me?”

“We are looking for John Manning.”

I look down the driveway thinking, of reasons why they would send three trucks of men, and said, “Why are you looking for my father? If you’re trying to sell him something, he’s an 80 year old man, and he doesn’t need any more junk.”

My fathers’ name is John also, so I’m hoping they decide they have wrong information and drive off. The man closes the door and turns to the back, and I raze the rock in my hand as a tall man steps out.

This man isn’t just over six feet, he almost reaches seven. Looking down at me he said, “Drop that rock John. We aren’t looking for your father.”

Two men of all different shapes came out of each of the other SUVs, and were closing in on me. I figured a rock wouldn’t scare these guys, so I dropped it and transformed myself into__________.

Two sentence stories?

I found these stories and had a laugh…. Thought I’d share them to encourage you all to try and write your own.

Think of an event and write a one-liner about it with a response.

Have a laugh….

1.
I was having a pleasant dream when what sounded like hammering woke me. After that, i could barely hear the muffled sound of dirt covering the coffin over my own screams!

2.
“I cant sleep”, she whispered, crawling into bed with me. I woke up cold, clutching the dress she was buried in.

3.
I begin tucking him into bed and he tells me, “daddy, check for monsters under my bed”. I look underneath for his amusement and see him, another him, under the bed, staring back at me quivering and he whispered “daddy, theres somebody on my bed!”

4.
You get home, tired after a long days work and ready for a relaxing night alone. You reach for the light switch, but another hand is what you feel instead on top of it!

5.
I cant move, breathe, speak, or hear and its so dark all the time. Had i known it would be this lonely, I would have been cremated instead…

6.
She went upstairs to check on her sleeping toddler. The window was open and the bed was empty… what happened?

7.
I never go to sleep… So why do I keep waking up?

8.
My daughter wont stop crying and screaming in the middle of the night. Visiting her grave and asking her to stop doesnt help either.

9.
After working a hard day, I came home to see my girlfriend cradling our child. I didnt know which was more frightening, seeing my dead girlfriend and stillborn child, or knowing that someone broke into my apartment and place them there.

10.
There was a picture of me sleeping in my phone. I live alone.

11.
I hope up to hear knocking on glass. At first I thought it was the window, until I
heard it coming from the mirror again.

12.
The last thing I saw was my alarm clock flashing 12:07 before she pushed her long rotting nails through my chest. her other hand muffling my screams. I sat bolt upright, relieved it was only a dream, but as I saw my alarm clock 12:07, I heard my closet door creak open.

13.
Growing up with cats and dogs, I got used to the sounds of scratching at my door while I slept. Now that i live alone, its much more unsettling.

14.
In all of this time that I have lived alone in this house, I could swear that I have closed more doors than I have opened.

15.
I heard my mother calling me from downstairs. As I started making my way down the stairs and towards the dark living room downstairs, I heard my mothers voice from upstairs yelling “DONT GO DOWN THERE, I HEARD THAT TOO”, as I found myself frozen in the middle of the dark stairs… (my personal favourite!)

16.
She asked me why was I breathing so heavily. I wasnt.

17.
My wife woke me up last night to tell me there was an intruder in our house. She was murdered by an intruder 2 years ago.

18.
I awoke to the sound of the baby monitor crackling with a female voice comforting my firstborn child. As I adjusted to a new position, my arm brushed against my wife, sleeping next to me.

19.
I always thought my cat had a staring problem – she always seemed fixated on my face, until one day, after looking at a picture of mine recently taken, she was always looking just right behind me…

20.
There is nothing like the laughter of a baby. Unless its 1 A.M. and you’re home alone.

The Hidden Want

I moved into a new home this week, well it wasn’t new, but it was new to me. It was listed as a roomy one bedroom, one level, house with a small yard. When I arrived to my new home it was empty. The old couch and chairs weren’t left in the living room. They even took the old aluminum table and chairs that were in the small kitchen.

I was hoping the metal bed frame was still in the bedroom with the old mattress, so I had a place to sleep the first night. I went to the bed room and it was empty except an old chest of drawers. I thought, Well at least I just need to get rid of one thing.

Expecting to spend the first night at my new house removing all of the junk that was left by the previous owners before the movers arrived tomorrow. I was relieved all there was is a three drawer chest, so I started to remove the big drawers and found them full of old sheets.

I brought a box of big trash bags with me, so I started filling one with the sheets. When I got to the bottom drawer I was starting to perspire, so I took a break with a bottle of water.

When I returned to the bedroom the bag had fallen over to the chest of drawers. I had removed the first two drawers, so the bag was falling into the chest. I scratched my head, but just shook it and got back to emptying the bottom drawer.

I was removing the last sheet and was perspiring more than usually, but I was down to the last one, so I kept at it. Under the sheet was a South American Tribal Mask that I was surprised to find. It was a big one, so I pulled the drawer out to the floor and looked at the mask.

Looking at the mask, I felt a strange sensation that I shook off and finished the bottle of water.  Leaning over the drawer I reached in, carefully lifted the mask, to my chest, and sat it on top of the chest of drawers. I was looking at it and I felt like it was looking back at me with its eyeless eye-sockets.

I almost laughed and shook that thought, but I kept watching it; for what I didn’t know. Then I thought of where I was going to hang the ugly thing, and I walked around the small house imagining where I would put the furniture. I couldn’t stop shaping each room’s layouts around the Mask as if I was going to hang it in every room.

That night I slept on the floor with the big blanket I brought and the mask was by my side all night. The next morning I had thoughts of sorrow after leaving for breakfast that I didn’t understand. Luckily after the movers had left I couldn’t find the mask.

Writing a suspenseful story?

 I was in the shower the other day hoping I’d be out before the cleaning lady got there, and I was thinking of the fear of the unknown. Is she going to be early today and walk in on me? “That did happen once.” I told myself not to worry she won’t be here before eleven.

___________________________________________________________

Stacy was taking a shower with no fear of what was happening outside of the bathroom. In the past she feared taking a shower, because with the water running she couldn’t hear anything ells. She saw a doctor who told her that fear of the unknown was like being scared of the dark.

“Why are some people scared of the dark?” He asked.

She gave the obvious answer, “Because they can’t see what’s there.”

“Why would there be anything more than what is there with the lights on?” He asked with a smile.

She thought for a moment, and said, “I guess nothing more if you’re at home, but I wouldn’t go down a dark ally.”

She accepted that it was safe to take a shower at home in her one bedroom apartment and was happily cleaning herself. She turned the water off to put shampoo in her hair and as she was rubbing her scalp, she heard a bump, but figured it was just the people upstairs.

After rinsing off she pulled the shower curtain opened and reaches for the towel that went to her face. She dried her face and then looked around the small bathroom, she went stiff, the towel drops to the floor, her hands go to her chest, and she let out a yelp, thinking, I shut that door.

She stared at the agar door for a moment, and jumped out of the tub to slam it shut. Leaning on the door making sure it’s shut as she locked it, backed away, looked around the room, and to the small closet, thinking, don’t be paranoid girl.

She finished drying off and turned to the locked door listening for any sound. She heard a shuffle, is that behind me?

Stacy took the early shower to be ready for the neighbor’s son, who she agreed to watch while his mother went out on a date.

The boy who was wearing, or should I say holding an oversized mask in front of his face that he brought to show her, and yelled, “Bogey, bogey, boo.”

Stacy screamed and everything went black after hitting her head on the sink of the small bathroom.

Pro Robotics

We make pro-robots that help you with the house work; a mother’s dream. You can have your pro-robot vacuuming your wall to wall carpeting while you are out shopping. Your pro-robot has floor scrubbers that scrub the kitchen floor. The pro-robot sprays your bathroom floor with scrubbing bubbles to loosen the grime in-between the tiles before it scrubs your bathroom floor. That’s right your pro-robot is not just a broombot with a mop, it automatically changes its settings; it will not get caught on your rugs when it vacuums the hard wood floors.

Pro Robotics is making the next evolution of robots for your home. Fathers, you can let your backs rest this fall we have a pro-robot with a leaf blower. The leaf blower is strong enough to blow snow off your driveways too. The pro-robot auto changes the force it blows the leaves, so they don’t blow on to your neighbor’s yard. Yes believe it, your pro-robot has eyes called radar that detects how much snow it has blown and where it has blown the leaves or snow.

The future of robotics is here in your home, with a sensor on your wrist the house could open doors, turn on lights, and best of all turn them off for you. If you’re thinking of those Sci-Fi Smart Homes you’ve seen in the movies that talk to you? They aren’t so sci-fi anymore with our audio response systems. Our research and development is working on the emotion chip right now. Don’t roll your eyes like that.

One of the geniuses we have working for us had an idea that he couldn’t believe hasn’t been developed. At last month’s meeting about new ideas he said it like this:

“I’ve had an idea of using an information data base with a search engine that searches for information based on a list of conditions. The conditions will be first categorized by importance as in state laws and federal laws. The federal laws are all overpowering to the state laws, but the state laws will form how the emotions chip would feel about the federal laws.”

After that statement, John got some strange looks.

“Okay now, everyone has to fallow the laws, but just believers have to fallow the church. What I’m thinking is to have the search engine search the database with moral values, but who says what’s moral? We can use laws and beliefs to have the search engine search for a response to any question. That way we can ask an emotions chip with the settings of the U.S. laws and the beliefs of a scientist, and then ask the same question of an emotions chip with beliefs of the Catholic Church, and we’d get a different answer”

That just blew my mind. John was asked about the AI system and he almost spit. He doesn’t like the term, Artificial Intelligence, and he had to explain how intelligence was just information. He said that the emotions chip was as smart as the information it had to work with.

———————————————————————

How smart is your emotions chip? Just had to ask…. I have been thinking of writing a story on this premise for years.